by an ANONYMOUS ACADEMIC ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT
In light of Jameis Winston’s involvement in a sexual assault case, let’s take a moment to consider Winston, the real victim here. Let’s not judge and contextualize him, or any other athlete for that matter, in a way that makes us feel more comfortable with ourselves and male sexuality. That would just be crazy. Especially with FSU in the hunt.
Look, I help run coffee to someone who runs an academic institution, and I know all about rape. According to the stats, there is probably someone you know – a friend, or a friend of a friend, or even someone you used to sleep with – that has been raped.
Before we go any further, I want to stress how complicated this issue is. Did you know that If I threw pie in your face and it got in your mouth, it’s rape? So take it with a grain of salt if someone tells you they’ve been “raped.”
They might have just been in a food fight.
If someone is real-raped, however — not pie-raped — they usually don’t choose to share this, or even report it. It happens a lot. Like, 60% of the time.
I for one, blame the people involved. If I was raped, I would tell someone. This isn’t a nuanced issue involving fear, power, institutional hierarchies and athletics. Plus I’m a guy. Guys can’t get raped. Everyone knows that.
When people do come to us saying they’ve been raped, it’s complicated. Rape happens in the shadows. Why, then, should we drag it out into the light?
It’s so much easier for 99% of the people involved to leave it festering in darkness. I want what’s best for everybody. Don’t you? Personally, I hate watching the news because nowadays it’s usually about black people knocking on doors asking for help and getting shot by white people. DEPRESS-ING.
I don’t want to hear about things that suck. Look, I know a few people that have been raped. I was crazy enough to listen to them, of course.
Please, tell me more about the time someone else made you feel like you weren’t a human being, I’m all ears.
Yeah right. What was I thinking? Last time I do that again.
It’s not like they didn’t see it coming. Boys and girls go to college. There is a lot of alcohol, a lot of hormones and a lot of sex. Sometimes signals get mixed or and /or ignored and obviously, people get raped.
But that doesn’t mean that I want to hear about it. I have a soul, and the plight of women across the world touches me in very deep ways. But violation of your body, ladies? No thanks. That’s just too depressing.
Obviously, I’m not the only person who feels this way. There’s a long list of academic institutions that discourage the report of rape: Occidental, Emerson, UConn, yada, yada, whatever.
Look, everyone discourages it. We all care.
I’m all about pursuing truth, but come on. If the truth is depressing, why pursue it? You don’t pursue something if it makes you unhappy. You avoid the sadness and you find the sunshine. If you can’t do that, then you start drinking.
We publicize stories like Mante T’eo’s fake lady-friend because it’s funny and relevant. Catfish was a
self-indulgent great movie. Until they showed the lady and those disabled children, of course. That was sad. They should have cut that part out.
Anyway, I understand what Emerson College was doing when they essentially ignored the girl who got raped there. It was depressing. Plus, she might have deserved it. If rape is as simple as not dressing up, going out or being interested in boys, then don’t do that stuff.
That Emerson girl got raped a second time by the same guy. You know what they say, right? Fool me once…
Have you ever been on the website Campus Rape? It’s such a depressing worldview. I’d rather go on Reddit or ESPN or Facebook and do things that make me LOL. You should too.
It’s for your own sake that we discourage these women from reporting sexual assault. Trust me, you don’t want to know about it. No one does. If they do report it, we’re doing you a favor by sweeping it under a rug.
Rape happens. Always has, always will. If there’s a positive we can take out of this, it’s that nowadays the rapist can grow from it. They can always emerge from the situation a better person.
They’ll have a family and treat women with the respect they deserve and teach their sons all about the beauty of the female body.
Personally, I don’t think that’s too heavy a price to pay for the theft of another person’s soul.
— Anonymous Academic Administrative Assistant
- College Football’s Sexual Assault Crisis (lostlettermen.com)
- Jameis Winston Case Just One Instance In Broader Climate of Rape and College Football (thebiglead.com)
- We’ve Been Measuring Rape All Wrong (slate.com)
- SCAR @ USC October Newsletter (studentcoalitionagainstrape.wordpress.com)